Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Happy Trails, Number 69

Today I got on a boat with Scarlet Colley, Mary Laddis, Rozzi the dolphin dog, some island visitors and a whole bunch of formerly cold-stunned green sea turtles -- each of which sported two new finrings and a unique number scrawled in white out.

These were the survivors and our mission was to return more that 60 of them to the wild as Texas Parks and Wildlife had deemed the water warm enough. We chugged across the bay from PI, picked up the turtles at the Sea Ranch and then headed north.

We (gently) tossed turtles in spurts, carefully observing to make sure that each one grabbed a big lungful of air or two and then dove down deep. "Bubble butts" - distressed turtles that float on the top of the water - are cause for concern and must be retrieved with nets and brought back to land for tests and medicine at Sea Turtle Inc.

We had to bring three "BB's" back to the Sea Ranch. Wishing numbers 1, 10 and 29 a speedy recovery -- and a ride on the next boat out.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

I'm sure there are lots of women aged 50-60 willing and eager to bear your love child, dude

I stopped flushing money down the match.com toilet ages ago. However, I still receive and sometimes read the "matches we've chosen for you" emails -- primarily for their entertainment value.

Here's a good one:

55, Kingsville, TX
5'8" (172.0cm),
Seeks: Women 50-60

He is divorced
His faith is Christian / Protestant
He definitely wants kids

Wednesday, January 06, 2010

"Perfect Pair"

What it is: an adult beverage comprised of pear vodka and fresh-squeezed whatever (today it's oranges)
When it is to be consumed: at precisely 5 PM after an at least somewhat productive day (slackers don't get perfect pair rewards 'round here)
Where: On a deck, preferably in the sun's waning rays

Additional Information: This is not a sociable drink, nor is it something you drink more than one of. Too much damn trouble. So you better make it good and big enough the first time.

Sez Who: Me. The keeper of the inn. That's who.
Official Mac Time: 4:57 PM